Am I a Nag?!?!

I am trying to learn how to speak to those people I find so beautiful... My counter part in this world the Black Man. Before you all start going off about how I discriminate, let me explain. My daddy is black, my brothers are black, my Papa and goddaddy are black and so is my son. So yes I have a huge place in my heart for the brotha.



With that being said I have a major problem... My MOUTH. I have such high expectations for Black men that I tend to push, and push hard. I push my brothers, son, and men I date. Its not that I am trying to get on their nerves, or even compete with them... I am really just trying to help them become the best at whatever. I understand that things can be hard, I know that the world will beat a man down until he is just a shell... but I want the men (specifically black men) in my life to know... IF NO ONE ELSE BELIEVES IN YOU... I AM HERE FOR YOU!

But I like many women have been told I can be a nag... WHAT?! This sometimes confuses me, my brothers are fine with my motivation and so are most of the men in my family... But when it comes to some of the men I date... They can not take it. If you say you're looking for a job... I'll say let me help with your resume. If you say I'm looking for a job... I'll ask where. How is that nagging? If you tell me your dream is to own your on construction business, I will say how do you plan to start.... I don't think this is nagging. To me its more of a way to get you to think about your next step. I'm not going to sugar coat BS either. If you tell me baby I'm looking for a job, yet you've been on the couch all day in your pjs... I'm going to say people don't advertise job openings on tv... Just saying. Or I'm starting my own business and you have done no research on the industry... I want to know how this is going to happen. I'm not trying to have someone sitting in my face flat out lying to me all the time...

Say what you mean and mean what you say... And don't fault me on believing you when you tell me you're going to do something. I'm just going off your word, and your word is really all you have.

Quick story -- my cousin didn't speak to me for about 2 years. All because I asked him if he liked jail...

Here's how it went down:

Me: Hey cuz glad you're out... how long you plan on being free this time
Cuz: Man I hate jail I aint trying to go back to dat Bitch..
Me: You sure? As much as you go in... I figured it was something in there you like.
Cuz: Dude whatever STFU
Me: No for real; Do you like it? You got a man in there or something... Or is it just easy to be a lazy ass cuz you're always being told what to do...
Cuz: See you on that bullshit cuz... I try to stay out, but its hard when you can't get a job and people always fucking with you.
Me: MOFO Please... you had a job at McDonad's last time you were out. Had the whole family supporting you mentally and financially. But you stole money from the safe... like you couldn't get it from any one of your peeps... Knowing you'd get caught cause they told you about the cameras... REALLY? You wanted to go back...
Cuz: FUCK YOU CUZ...

Okay so maybe that wasn't the best story... I was sort of being a sarcastic ass there... but you get my point.

So give it to me straight.... AM I A NAG?