30 Letters, 30 days... Day 3_ To my parents

Dear Parents:

I was trying to figure out how to write you guys together. Lord knows you're totally different people. I mean sometimes I wonder how you got together in the first place, then I realize it may have only been to create me and my brothers and for that I am thankful. You guys separated a while ago and I never told how upset I was... It really bothered me that my family was no longer together. I was crushed. There weren't very many people in my classes that had 2 parents in the home, but I was one of the lucky ones. I realized that.

At one point I was daddy's girl, his baby girl. Daddy you made sure I was safe, and happy. Don't get me wrong, you didn't have to be so hard all the time. I knew why you did it though, you wanted me to have more. Saw my potential even at a young age. Tisiphani... Is the name you gave me. I realized after looking it up, why it was so important for me to be called by the name one of the Erinyes. But dad I've always wanted to know... What happened? You not only left mom, but you left me? I was the baby girl. Your youngest daughter and you left me at the time I needed you most. I had just started dating and could have used my dad's guidance. Not just the passing advice you would give as you would call ever 3 months... But I needed my daddy. Even now... You live down the street and I barely see you. My son only knows you as "Pee-Paw... on the wall". That's not fair. I know you thought mom was telling us about you and what you were going through but, to be fair she never did. I only found out the truth about the past recently as an adult, and I still don't care. You're my dad and that will never change.

Mom I thank you for your strength and determination as a child. I really needed that. You struggled after daddy left, but hell I thought we were rich. Eating cereal for dinner was a fun treat for me... I didn't know it was all we had. Your love made me feel like I could go out and conquer the world. In fact it still does and I'm working on that conquering part. Mom I just wanted to tell you how as much as I appreciate what you did when I was young... it may be time for you to let go. I love how involved with your grandson you are, and how you just want to make sure I'm taken care of. But I need you to know, you raised a great lady... now let me be a woman. I will never disrespect you cause you are my MOTHER... but when I say no. That's what I mean. You taught me to mean what I say and say what I mean. That's what I am doing. I know I do somethings differently from you, engage in activities you avoid, and am all around more outgoing... Respect me for that. Allow me to be me, to make my own mistakes and get messy. I know you just want to protect me, but realize this... You raised me so well that I know in order to grow some mistakes... I JUST HAVE TO MAKE on my own, but guess what I will learn from them. Mom I'm a risk taker, and yes it has led me to getting hurt. But it won't stop me from taking more risks and trying harder.

Basically what I am saying guys is I love you BOTH. For who you are, and who I am... I honor my mother and father. I just need you to honor and except me too.

Love your daughter,
Tisiphani